The American Dream

Although my first post was born out of 5 minutes of disgust and anguish over the Kaveri situation helped by a short break in my project work, this one is more of a personal rambling of a depressed and possibly deranged individual. I have often told people ” Fear can hold you prisoner,hope can set you free” .Though its right out of a movie, it was more than just a fancy tag line for me. It was the very words that inspired me ,that gave me hope and that helped me through every tough situation I found myself in. The few people that I have convinced to watch the movie have given the movie top marks. They too have confirmed ( I do not know whether they say it to satisfy me or whether they really were inspired by it) that watching the movie added a bit more to their life. Gave them hope!!

It was with this hope and inspiration that I convinced myself to apply to around 10 Universities in the USA. To be extremely frank ,at first more than the prospect of 'learning' , I was more interested in the monetary benefits that uncle Sam promised. As I went through the joy of applying which is a horror that I hope I will never have to go through again, I gradually had a change of heart and suddenly I wanted to go there not because the promised land was beckoning me with wads of green paper but because I was attracted to the professional air with which universities and researchers went about doing their job. The only bit of research that I had seen my lecturers performing was when they were trying to find other jobs that paid them the little extra. It was at that moment that I was sure that I wasn't born to just gobble up pieces of information that my lectures managed to spew right out of text books. I wanted to do some genuine research for a start. With this esteemed opinion of the white man and with about 50,000 Rs of my father's hard earned money, I went ahead and tapped the doors of the some Universities

The websites of almost all Universities are quite impressive and can even entice a beggar to apply for an admit. All of you guys interested in a career in marketing, you need not take up any specific course, all you need to do is go through the ADMISSIONS page of some Universities. However, what the websites forget to mention is : “ You are most welcome... but only after our own American backs are covered”. The ' Equal opportunity to all' reminder is written in a corner of the page reminding me of “ STATUTORY WARNING : CIGR...........” I am considered only after their own students have had the lions share of the admits and I may have to pay almost double of what they have to shell out.

Of course, we may do the same but I am not exactly making an attitude comparson.

I am totally frustrated with transcripts ,recommendations and statements and other nitty gritty details that encompass an application. Whether I am successful or not, I would be relieved when its over. In fact, last week I was completely deflated when a University( Name withheld for security concerns :) apologized for a seemingly innocuous mistake that almost gave me a heart attack and raised my telephone bill by about 100 rupees. This was the last straw. I have had enough. I want out. I want it all to end!! For those who are familiar with the lines from a famous movie : “ella manushanukkum oru breaking point irruku”!! I am sure half of the people who are going to read this are also eagerly awaiting replies from the various academic institutions that had promised them the sky. For all of you out there, remain hopeful and if you don't get an admit this year do try next year because that is one of the most significant way the university gets money. My advice for those who want to follow my footsteps and apply to universities next year , you stand to lose a lot of 'dough'. After spending a lot of money if you realize that you are successful, well, there is always the exception to anything. If you are not successful, you were warned about it.

I may wait 'hopefully' for about a month or so and if any University is 'unfortunate' and 'foolish' enough to follow the equal opportunity policy literally and also find me suitable, fine by me. If the Universities continue to hand out the “ The number of qualified applications is much more than the number of positions that we have.....” line then I guess I might have to say goodbye to the American dream and start looking for a job and a way to compensate my father's money. I wish I could say I would be hoping that I get an admit but I can not because my brain and my heart( rarely do they tend to think along the same lines) seem to think that enough is enough!So much for Hope . HUMBUG!!